The top five beers I’ve had recently

“Everybody has to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink.” — all-around funny man W.C. Fields.

O’BRIENS IRISH PUB, Santa Monica — Greatest Pro Bowls of all time, and other stuff drank beer yesterday. Greatest Pro Bowls of all time, and other stuff will most likely drink beer again today.

With that fun in mind, here is a list of the top five beers Greatest Pro Bowls of all time, and other stuff has had recently (not in any specific order, really; listed alphabetically, actually) …

Brett Favre watch: Day 29

“I kind of hope it happens, so he can fail.” — Fran Tarkenton, on Brett Favre considering a return.

Seriously? Now what? Tarkenton, a Minnesota Vikings great and Hall of Famer, absolutely went off when the subject of Favre was unfortunately brought to his attention.

Wolfsburg celebrates first title with beers … lots and lots of beer

“Ich wusste, dass wir gut sind. Wir haben die ganze Saison starke Leistungen gebracht, und ich denke, dass wir verdient Meister geworden sind. Der Abschied fällt schwer, ist doch klar.” — Wolfsburg manager Felix Magath, on his team winning the German Bundesliga title.

VfL Wolfsburg totally faced Werder Bremen, 5-1, in the German Bundesliga finale and claimed its very first domestic league championship.

A most righteous celebration ensued …

Good luck, UFL!

“To fulfill the unmet needs of football fans in major markets currently underserved by professional football by providing a high quality traditional football league comprised of world class professional football players.” — UFL mission statement.

Everywhere you turn, people are taking about it. Like Miss California’s well-thought-out views on stuff and the latest earth-shattering updates from American Idol, this hot-button topic just won’t go away.

That’s right, the buzz you hear has to do with a new football league opening play this fall: The United Football League.

The ‘Big Sloppy Shift’

“I’m sorry, guys. I don’t feel like talking right now. Just put down, ‘Papi stinks.’” — David Ortiz, following an 0-for-7 performance in a 12-inning loss by the Boston Red Sox.

In the wake of the newly instituted Jason Varitek shift, big-league managers have gone a step further when the all-star formerly known as Big Papi, David Ortiz, lumbers to the plate, Greatest Pro Bowls of all time, and other stuff has learned from watching the Boston Red Sox’s latest matchup with the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim on Thursday.

What if top U.S. athletes played soccer?

Sports Illustrated took a crack at what the U.S. national soccer team would look like if our nation’s greatest athletes played soccer, like in other nations.

This column was eerily similar to something I pieced together for FOXSports.com ahead of the 2006 World Cup.

Of course, three years later, the rosters would look a bit different, but some of the same players appeared on both.

Brett Favre watch: Day 10

“To be honest, you look at our situation, Brett Favre is a great one-year-type deal. You get to play with him, and say, ‘Hey, I played with Brett Favre,’ and tell your grandkids one day, ‘I was Brett Favre’s teammate.’ But I look at our team the way we’re stacked right now. We have a good group of veterans and a good group of young guys. We have a solid team for the next four or five or however many years we stay together.” — Minnesota Vikings DE Jared Allen, on rumors that Brett Favre may join his team.

The curtain appears to be closing on the theater of the absurd.

We hope!

Please!

Brett Favre watch: Day 9

“Once he puts that purple he will become an enemy which is all part of the game.. It’s hard to imagine him doing that.” — Green Bay Packers linebacker Nick Barnett, on Twitter.

A funny thing happened on the way to Hattiesburg: The name Brad Childress was nowhere to be found on the incoming flights’ manifests at Hattiesburg-Laurel Regional Airport.

Bus Cook wasn’t seen standing there all alone in the dormant terminal holding up a sign that read “Mr. Childress.”

Brett Favre, as reported on NFL Network, was busy doing pretty much what many would expect, yard work.

Brett Favre watch: Day 7

What now? This is serious stuff, now.

On-again, off-again NFL retiree Brett Favre and Minnesota Vikings coach Brad Childress are planning to meet later this week at an undisclosed location (Broke Spoke, perhaps?).

Top five most anticipated movies of the summer

“I’m coming for blood, no code of conduct, no law.” — Wolverine, from X-Men Origins: Wolverine.

Tonight is going to be magical.

Tonight, Greatest Pro Bowls of all time, and other stuff is going to see the first big blockbuster of this very promising summer movie season.

That would be X-Men Origins: Wolverine, a feel-good superhero story about a man with metal blades that come out of his hands. Should be a great popcorn flick.

It is one of Greatest Pro Bowls of all time, and other stuff’s Top Five Most Anticipated Movies of the Summer Season^TM.

Let’s break down that list right here …